I don't know how to say this, but you're a perv.
I think I realised it when I was taking a walk with Mr and Mrs Bush, and I saw you sit on my Cartman-statue.
I'm sure you're senile enough to understand that Santa doensn't exist.
Im sending back your artificial teeth, but I'm keeping your suicide-note as a memory.
You should know that I get sick when I think about a new life as a clone.
Go to hell,

Mike.

By the way, NONE OF THE ABOVE WAS TRUE IT WAS ALL A LIE.
...Or WAS it?
Got it all from this thingy which I stoeld from , so just have a laugh . Please. There's no need for that piano wire...

Dear- -> choose a friend<-

I don't know how to say this, but __1__.
I think I realised it __2__ __3__, and I saw you __4__ __5__.
I'm sure you're __6__ enough to understand __7__.
Im sending back __8__, but I'm keeping __9__ as a memory.
You should know that I __10__ __11__.
__12__ /-your name-


1.THE COLOR OF YOUR SHIRT:

blue- our romance is over
red- our affair is at an end
white- I'm joining a monastery
black- I hate you
green- our horoscopes doesn't match
grey- You're a perv
yellow- I'm on the streets
pink- Your nostrils are an insult
brown- the mafia is after you
no shirt- You're a loser
other- I'm in love with your sister


2. WHAT MONTH WERE YOU BORN IN?

January- that night
february- last year
mars- when we were skinny dipping
april- when I was high on sesame seed
may- when I was shaving your legs
june- when you put handcuffs on me
july- when I threw up
august- When I saw the tiny head
september- when your dwarf bit me
october- When I was taking a walk
november- When I tied my shoes
December- When your dog went crazy

3. FAV FOOD?
tacos- in your house
pizza- in your van
pasta - in London
Hamburger- Under the bus
salad- while you were eating enchiladas
chicken- with Chuck Norris
kebab- in your closet
fish- in woman-clothes
sandwich- at the mental hospital
hotdogs- in trans
other- with mr and mrs Bush

4. WHATS THE COLOR OF YOUR SOCKS?
yellow- hitting on
red- insulting
black- ignoring
blue- punching
purple- pour syrup on
white- carve your name in
grey- tear the clothes of
brown- put leeches on
pink- steal the toupee from
no socks- sit on
other- chasing out


5. WHAT'S THE COLOR OF YOUR UNDERWEAR?
black – my best friend
White- my father
grey- john travolta
Brown- my whoopee cushion
purple- my pie
red- th cookiemonster
blue- my alovera plant
Yellow- my pen-pal from Ghana
Orange – my Carl Larsson-collection
pink – my cat
no underwear – my Cartman-statue
Other- The crazy monk

6. WHAT DO YOU WATCH ON TV?
Scrubs - man
O.C. - sensitive
One Tree Hill - open
Heroes - ashamed
Lost - turned on
House - cowardly
Simpsons - scarred
the news - Mongolian
American Idol – masochistic
Family Guy - senile
other - frost-bited

7.WHAT MOOD ARE YOU IN RIGHT NOW?
happy- how bad I've been feeling
sad- How boring you are
bored- that your Honda sucks
angry- that all your pimples are in the last stadium
Depressed- That I have changed sex
exited- that there's no solution to
nervous- the Middle east
Worried- that we're cousins
apathetic- that Santa doensn't exist
Ashamed- that I'm allergic to your hamster
Hugable- that the garbage-man turns me on
exceedingly happy- that I'm a clone
other- "Deal or no deal" sucks

8. THE COLOR OF YOUR BEDROOM/WALLPAPER?
white- your ring
yellow- your love letters
red- your Darth Vader-poster
black- your pet rock
blue- the pillows
green- the pictures of Portugal
Orange- your artificial teeth
brown- your cellphone
grey- our matching snoopy-bibs
pink- the old toe-nails
other- your military service-memory-box

9. THE FIRST LETTER IN YOUR NAME?
A/B - Your picture
C/D - the oil-stock shares
E/F - My virginity
G/H - your neighbor Carl
I/J - The blood-test results
K/L- your left ear
M/N - Your suicide-note
O/P - my sense
Q/R - your mom
S/T - Your collection of butterflies
U/V/W - your crime records
X/Y/Z- your highschool grades


10. LAST LETTER OF YOUR LASTNAME?
A/B – shall always remember
C/D – never will forget
E/F – Always will try to forget
G/H – will inform The Swedish Tax Agency
I/J – have always felt dirty because of
K/L – have never laughed in public about
M/N – am makin a movie about
O/P – throw rocks at
Q/R – informed the psychiatrist about
S/T – get sick when I think about
U/V/W – told the news paper about
X/Y/Z – never liked

11. FAV DRINK?
water- our friendship
beer - pensioner
Soda- a new life as a clone
milk- eskimos
wine- cocaine addiction
Cider- a passionated intrest for mice
Juice- woody allen-imitations
limonade- your embarrassing rashes
Whisky - destroying the 2nd world war
other- hating Shrek

12. WHERE DO YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION?
Thailand - Best wishes
Sweden- love
England- With pain
Spain- Go f*ck youself
China- gross wishes
Germany- With relief
Japan- go to hell
Greece - Your enternal enemy
Austraila- say goodbye to your pet frog Leonard from me
Egypt- Go now
France- Good luck
Other- Say goodbye to your creepy family from me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

1) Raised in: A cardboard box! Yay for hobos!

2) Your name: Michael. Panagiotidis. It's like, Greek or something.

3) Birth date: October 14th.

4) Any siblings: One older sister, and one older brother.

5) Oldest of them all: Matthew. He's 24-5-6. I dunno, one of 'em. Probably.

6) Hair color: Brown. What shade of brown? _Sexy_ brown.

7) Hair length: Short-like.

8) First school: Was teh gay, but I manage to convince myself it wasn't because I had friends there.
I think I talk to one of them still.

9) Eye color: Varying.

10) Shoe size: BIG ENOUGH FOR YOU AND ALL YOUR FAMILIES

11) Mood: Apathetic. Seriously, I should be playing Sonic Riders ZG right now.

12) Smell: I DON'T KNOW!!!

13) Height: Tall-esque?

14) Lefty/righty: SOMETIMES I USE BOTH.
...Isn't this usually when someone shoots me?


LOVE LIFE:

1) Do you remember your first real relationship? Ah yes, I remember it well.
GIRL - MICHAEL WE LIVE TOO FAR AWAY.
GUY - But it's like, a ten-minute walk.
GIRL - FUSLK YOU AND ALL UR FAMILIEZ

2) Do you believe in love? Personally, yeah. It's just very, very, VERY rare for people like me.

3) Shortest relationship? There was this one time that went for three years, until I finally found out I was just an idiot and there was nothing there.
Do I win anything nao?

4) Have you ever been heartbroken? Many a time. 'Tis a curse that blights ALL ye Ninja-Pirates! Yar...

5) Do you like someone now? Just lust after anyone hot.

6) Have you ever fallen for a friend? ...MY LIFE IN NUTSHELL K THX BAI

7) Are you afraid of commitment? Only a little bit...

8) Do you believe in love at first sight? Lust? Yes. Love? Fuck no.

9) Longest relationship? Like, maybe almost a year? Half a year?
FUCK YOU ALL.


THIS OR THAT:

1) Love or money? FUCK YOU ALL.

2) Coffee or alcohol? Booze.

3) One night stands or relationships? Relationships.
Don't be so surprised, that slut might've had the herpes.

4) Television or Internet? Y'know what they say, "the Internet is for porn".

5) Pepsi or coke? VANILLA COKE SMAAAAASH

6) Long night out or romantic night in? Depends how many EXPLOSIONS are involved.

7) Phone or in Person? Either way; I'm not a big phone person, though.

HAVE YOU EVER:

1) Have you ever been caught sneaking out? No.

2) Have you ever skinny dipped? I wish.

3) Have you ever done something you regret? MY LIFE IN A NUTSHELL K THX BAI

4) Have you ever been on a house boat? They have HOUSES on BOATS now?
FUCK. YEEEES.

5) Have you ever finished an entire jawbreaker? I never even ate one.

6) Have you ever colored your hair? No.

7) Have you ever been streaking? Would be kinda cool, were it not for my sometimes-shy-ness-y-stuff.

ARE YOU:

1) Are you missing someone right now? Not really.

2) Are you talking to anyone right now? I'm taling to _you_, baby.

3) Are you German? NYET.
I know it doesn't fit, but NYET.

4) Are you Indian? No.

5) Are you French? No.

6) Are you Mexican? THAT WOULD BE SO AWESOME but no.

7) Are you Norwegian? No.

8) Are you Arabic? No.

9) Are you Irish? No.

10) Are your parents still married? N- NO WAIT I MEANT YES FUCK YOU ALL.


DO YOU:

1) Do you get depressed about things easily? Every now and again.

2) Do you live life to the fullest? Kind of. I'M EATING A _FULL_ BAG OF CHIPS BITCH!

3) Are you comfortable with the way you look? I am. It's just nobody else is.
WHY DON'T ANY OF YOU LOVE ME!?
GIRL - Cute nerds are in now.
ME - Am I in now?
GIRL - Oh, fuck no.
ME - WHAAH. WHAAH.

4) How do you dress? _Sexily_.

5) Are you scared of growing old alone? Dying old and alone, yeah. Growing old alone? Nope. I'll just break my spine on my LONESOME. k thx.

6)What do you want to be when you grow up? Many things. One of them is a non-virgin.
Another one is a robot!

7) Favorite season? Autumn, because leaves=fun.

8) Are you a vegetarian? VANILLA COKE STEAK SMAAAASH

9) Current song your listening to? It's like, 1:30. IN THE MORNING.